Three women were chatting together

Three women were sitting together, each proudly talking about her child’s success.

The first woman said, “My son finished top of his class at Oxford. He’s a doctor now, earning around $250,000 a year in Chicago.”

The second woman smiled and replied, “That’s nice, but my son graduated first from Cambridge. He became a lawyer, makes about half a million a year, and lives in Los Angeles.”

The third woman calmly added, “Well, my son struggled in school. He never went to college at all. But he earns a million pounds a year in London as a sports repair specialist.”

The other two women looked confused and asked, “What exactly is a sports repair specialist?”

She answered, “He fixes things… hockey matches, football matches, snooker matches—whatever needs fixing.”

Three men and a dangerous river

Three men were hiking when they suddenly reached a wild, fast-moving river blocking their path. They had to cross but couldn’t see a safe way.

The first man prayed, “God, please give me the strength to cross this river.” Instantly, he gained powerful arms and legs. He swam across, nearly drowning a few times, and made it after two exhausting hours.

The second man prayed, “God, give me strength—and the tools—to cross.” Immediately, a rowboat appeared. He rowed across in about an hour, nearly tipping over more than once.

The third man, learning from the others, prayed, “God, give me strength, the tools, and the intelligence to cross.” In an instant, God turned him into a woman. She checked the map, walked upstream a short distance, and crossed safely over a bridge.

Three men at Heaven’s gate

Three men stood outside the gates of Heaven. An angel told them, “Your ride across the bridge will depend on how long you were faithful to your last partner.”

The first man said, “I was married for five years and cheated three times.”

The angel handed him the keys to an old pickup truck.

The second man said, “I was married eleven years and cheated once.”

He was given a Mercedes.

The third man said proudly, “I was married twenty years and never cheated. We truly loved each other.”

Impressed, the angel rewarded him with a gold Lamborghini.

The man drove past the others. Hours later, the other two found him sitting alone in a diner, crying.

One of them said, “Come on, it’s Heaven. Things could be worse.”

The man looked up and replied, “Worse? Half an hour ago I passed my wife… and she was riding a skateboard.”