My Family Sees Me as an ATM, But I Refuse to Pay

I’ve always been the dependable one in my family, but I’ve also been the one who’s expected to pay. My parents spoiled my younger brother, always going to me for help when he needed it. I was so used to paying for everything that I never questioned it.

I helped him buy a car when he turned 18, and when he lost his job and couldn’t pay his rent, I let him move in with me and gave him money whenever he came up short. But my patience reached a breaking point two years ago. My parents asked me to cover their share of his wedding costs because they couldn’t afford it, but I refused. I had just given birth to my second child and couldn’t take on the extra expense. Since then, things have been tense. Every time I say no, my parents accuse me of being the worst sister in the world.

Things reached a new low last week. My parents called, asking if I could watch my brother’s baby while he went on a business trip. I asked why his wife couldn’t do it, and they told me she wanted to use the time to visit her family. I refused. I told my mother that if my sister-in-law wanted to leave the baby behind, she would need to contribute financially or hire a sitter. My mother immediately offered to cover the cost herself, but I still refused. I told her my brother needed to learn responsibility and figure out how to handle life without constant help from family. She broke down in tears and begged me to reconsider, but I stood my ground.

A couple of days later, my sister-in-law called. She accused me of trying to “ruin” my brother’s trip and of “tearing the family apart” because I was “too greedy” to watch my nephew. She said my brother might have to cancel and could even lose his job. Now, none of them are speaking to me, and my husband thinks I might have been too harsh.